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20:25 - Jan. 15, 2007
just talking
it's amazing how i can feel so connected to someone i barely know; as if we're two sides of the same coin. still, i could be mistaken - i could just be caught assuming things again. but i read once that if you stay true to your heart, at least you'll always have one friend who will never lie to you. i began violin lessons today with a teacher i really, really like and hope can help. i feel empowered to learn and practice well, and am beginning to see how important it is to have a good teacher. and not only a good one, but one who listens to the students' needs, and adjusts teaching methods and material accordingly. she went straight for the issues which are concerning me and gave me practical and applicable advice and techniques to work on. i'm going to enjoy this.i've been missing him these nights. if only to hear his "voice" over email, i looked forward to that and i would never grudge him time with his sister, but friday is when he'll be free again. still, the time we're taking in this process of getting to know one another is good and healthy for me - it allows me time to reflect and take constant stock of where i am, so i don't rush in horns first (i am an aries, after all). and this isn't like any relationship i've been in before, nor do i want it to be. i'm young enough that i still have an agenda for myself - like working for another 4 years here, and going to grad school for my master's before i leave the area - but if i had to choose between my agenda and a marriage i'm not sure which i'd pick. i'm really not sure. i suppose, like everyone in a good marriage seems to say to me, it depends on who he is. and for now, i'm here being patient.
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