12:33 - Nov. 23, 2004
c'est pourquoi j'existe
what is left when we forgive? it's the last line in a movie: "when we forgive our fathers, what is left?"
i feel disjointed; literally like someone has seperated me at all my joints and i am laying here, stretched out and disconnected. what brings me joy? what do i love? how can i serve? it's that last one which holds it all. it's the 'why am i here'. and maybe, at this point, i don't care how i serve but just that i serve. it's my meaning, my purpose, my raison d'être. it somehow justifies my existence; my taking up space and air and food and precious water on this planet. if i can give back to life, i can let myself exist without guilt.
